Sooo… Now that mom’s surprise birthday is a past event, I can publish the God events surrounding it. J I am continually humbled by His incredible grace and mercy! We truly have a God who is intimately interested in us and who loves us more than we could possibly understand. As far as mom’s party, for those who didn’t know, My mom had a surprise birthday party this past weekend. I’m guessing that around 100 friends and family were there to surprise her and it was a huge blessing to her! J With the plans to go to Israel in the fall, she was hoping to get some special time in with some people that she didn’t normally see. Her parents came down from NY which was also very special. I drove up Friday without her knowing, stayed at a friend’s house Friday night and surprised her at her party on Saturday. It was amazingJ! Some of you know that just about a week ago I wasn’t even sure that I would be able to make it to her party. I didn’t have money for gas and wasn’t sure how things were going to work out. I’d been praying about it for a few weeks and had some friends praying with me, but as of 5 days before the party, I still had no money, nor way to earn it. I did some work for Chuck’s hoping to make the money I needed only to find out that payday was this coming Friday, not the Friday before the party. But God is Good! Several weeks ago, I had called on a job opportunity in Yellow Springs doing yard work and pretty much whatever for a couple who lived on a 50-acre farm out there. I had been interviewed on the phone but that was the last I heard of it and I knew there were several other applicants ahead of me. However, on Monday, this couple called me in to do some work and I was able to work Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. I was paid cash after each day and between that work and a sweet couple in my church who randomly gave me $20 specifically for gas in my truck, I had enough money to surprise my mom and also have some quality time with some close friends who are going through some really hard times. I was also able to work on my truck(another gift from God) and get it in much better working condition. God is definitely amazing and His timing is definitely His own! I have seen God work in so many ways to give me so much, First and foremost He has given me Life! ….

At this point, the ordered part of the note is over so you can continue browsing facebook or xanga if you desire, the rest of this will be the random ramblings of a broken man reflecting on the gifts of God.

The concept of life has persistently invaded my thinking lately. I have come to the conclusion that my view of life is so very twisted and forgetful of what my Father has given me in His Word telling me about life. My default conception of life is just my every day schedule of existence, going through classes, emotional ups and downs, participation in "spiritual" activities, etc. Recently, I was reminded of the true essence of life as is so well summed up in John 17:3. Jesus prays "This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent." Life is not school, church, or my relationships. It is not even "serving" God. Eternal life is knowing God…. Whenever I say that, I need to pause and think of the implications of what I just read. So much of my life is wrapped up in mere selfish existence. Yet Christ offers me true life… right now… to really, truly live! What is my mindset as I race through these hectic days? I’m so busy with my empty existence that I forget to live! I’m not advocating that I give up my schedule, but instead that my schedule be formed and pursued by the active, intentional purpose of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. Its so basic and simple, but I am so quick to forget Him and push this simple truth aside. I long for the attitude of Paul in Phil. 3 "But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead." It is completely true that the times that I have felt the most alive have been the times that I have been the most concerned with knowing my Father and His precious Son. In church, we have just begun a series on Gal. 5 looking at life in the Spirit and the fruit of the Spirit in particular. My mind quickly runs to John 15 when I think of Gal.5 and the fruit of the Spirit as I think about what it means to abide in the Vine. The fruit is the Spirit’s work without a doubt. It manifests itself in our lives as relationship with Christ grows deeper and we cannot manipulate it or produce it on our own, all we can do is concentrate on how connected we are to the Vine! With this in mind, cultivating that connection with Christ on our part involves the setting aside of things in our lives that separate us from Him; Many times sin, but also those things that aren’t necessarily wrong, but are just worthless or hinder us from knowing Him more fully. Recently, my soul has been screaming for this knowledge of God. Its like I’ve been starving myself from the intimacy that He longs to have with me and that part of me also is desperate for in Him. Yet I am so quick to bury His voice with my monotonous existence. He has truly given me so much and I don’t even take advantage of it. Thank God for His exceeding grace and persistent tugging at our souls. Anyway, this has become longer than I intended. Every now and then I’m reminded of how helpless my plight is apart from Him and when I realize the goodness that is directed toward me, its needs to come out. I wish it would come out more often. So, in finally wrapping this up- something else that I hadn’t thought much about before: Part of the fruit of the Spirit is faith, what does that mean to you?

Claim me as your own

This foolish heart entrenched in self deceit

Lost, accursed, alone

In this swirling sea of Your silence.

Choking cries stifled in drowning

Grace my only hope resounding.

Desperate.

Starving for Your touch

To taste the light of Your truth upon my heart and lips.

Desperate.

Alone, my soul is crushed

Your grace my only hope resounding.

Take this treacherous self

Make this feeble one Your beloved child

Your words my very life

Your touch throughout eternity sustains

Deficiency by blood perfected.

Whorish infidelity by grace accepted

Desperate.

Starving for Your touch

To taste the light of Your truth upon my heart and lips.

Desperate.

Alone, my soul is crushed

Your grace my only hope resounding.

The fallow broken, cultivate in me

Love for you from every part of being

Faith in every orifice pervades

Because of righteous blood overlaid

I wish I had more time to tell a story, but I don't. So ask me if you see me. The gist of the story is- I got my truck registered this weekend, had an amazing time with my church family and brother, had the truck break down on the way back to Cedarville, but absolutely everything happened with precise God timing so that the truck and I are both fine and better for the experience. Hope that everyone is doing well! Question for everyone, with Easter coming and the crucifixion and ressurrection on the mind, what do you think about the idea of lent?